Looking through things on line while I ate my lunch, I came across this article. Although I don't watch her on the Housewives show she is on, or really know a lot about her in any other capacity, I immediately felt for what she said in this article. Her emotions so mirror the ones I had and still have now. That first flicker of 'Oh no, I wasn't planning this' gives way to the excitement only to have it taken back again. If you read my blog at all you have seen that I carry a HUGE bag of guilt around with me from my miscarriage, feeling like it was my fault for not protecting the baby better. Hearing that another woman logically knows it is wrong but still feels that makes me feel a little less crazy. Oh and that fact that she says that she had a small relief that the ill timed pregnancy difficulties were no more is just wonderful to read. (obviously wonderful is an odd term here, go with it) I love to hear a woman be honest about loss and miscarriage because it is really REALLY hard to be honest with yourself and a whole different monster to be honest out loud to other people. This woman is brave for being able to say these things in an interview and put herself out there.
-I have to say that personally hearing a woman who is financially independent, married, older than me and otherwise in a good place say she felt some relief really makes me pause. I felt that small relief that I wasn't going to care for a child that I wasn't sure I was ready for and that my then fiance and I had a chance at a regular young married life together and the chance for TB to be stable and secure in a career. Truthfully it's easier not to have a child with all that is going on in our lives right now. But maybe that's a little selfish. I've had some nasty insults from people who say I 'deserved' the miscarriage because we were young and not yet married, its just kinda nice to hear that someone else has been in that mindset.
Aside from all that, I just wanted to praise her for her honesty.
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